Don't Take Anything Personally

I just recently posted on facebook a book entitled Non-Violent Communication and its lessons I have learned. This was passed onto me from my one and only female yoga teacher Judith Hanson-Lasater. We live in a world afraid to speak our truth. I'm not talking about our judgements about each other (like I don't like your dress or your haircut), I'm talking about my own personal transforming moments of my personal journey of growth that I want to share with the people I love. EVERYONE takes it personally, like how it affects them or that the conversation is 'about them'.  In some ways they may be part of 'why' we wanted to transform ourselves, but the journey is about us.  Don Miguel Luis reminds us in The Four Agreements (agreement #2) Don't Take Anything Personally.  I recently shared with my mom how I am very bummed out that after my divorce no one in my family came to console me and I was devastated. Yes I moved forward and onward because that is what strong people do.  But I still hurt and wouldn't mind someone just sitting with me even while I cried, so that I didn't have to be alone. I would never 'ask' anyone to, friends just do it without asking, as my friend Amy did. I love her. Also in the last 3 years and during this time I moved into my own townhouse, started and opened a successful yoga studio and became more successful as a woman business owner and bought a new car. No one in my family has seen my home, seen my studio or been to visit me in over 3 years. They can take trips and vacations to other states and countries, but none to see me. Even though I am single without kids, and I go there about 1-2 times a year, I'd LOVE to show them all I've done to move forward in my life in the direction I was meant to go by Spirit. I want to SHARE IT with them. But no one comes and I could feel unimportant.  Luckily for me I am a yogi and I love them and they make their own choices. I miss them, but I am not mad or resentful. Just wishful to show them I overcame heartbreak!  anyhow the point is that I verbalized my sadness. It is mine and I shared it. I am allowed to. It isn't meant to hurt them or say they are bad people. It is to help me and help them KNOW me better.  Isn't that what real communication is all about and, isn't that how we draw the right people to us, by being Ourselves! When we communicate we use the word I, not you. We don't blame. I am sad. I am hurt. I wish they would come see what I created because I want to share it WITH them. Use the word 'I" when talking about yourselves and your feelings and leave 'them' out of it. Using 'I' is empowering, honest and a journey into healing and growth. "I" hope you trust yourself enough to be brave and speak honestly and openly with everyone you love.  Namaste'